Alright let’s face it, Saints Row The Third and all titles following it are absolute abominations. Now don’t get me wrong, they can be fun to play and there were reasons for the switch however if you are a fan of the Saints series this new generation of The Third Street Saints is a low blow to the true fans. This is something that has bothered me for years on end now, and I’m not going to sit here and beat a dead horse discussing the questionable graphical or plot changes in the later entries of the series. I’m going to explain how it’s not too late to fix the Saints Row series and how it should go about being handled.
Now before we dive in let’s clarify that in my vision Saints The Third and all following titles are NOT canon. The following will take place in the year 2012, One year after the events of Saints Row 2 and will be titled Saints Row 3… yes Saints Row 3, Not “The Third”, 3 and before we hop into the comments full of piss and vinegar, If Call of Duty can get away with “Modern Warfare” then Saints Row 3 it is.
The game would open with the player surrounded by Johnny Gat, Peirce, Shaundi, and even Troy. It is revealed that the player had been in a coma for the past year… again. A subtle joke is made about the boss having a “knack” for finding himself in these situations. The boss explains this alternate reality he has seemingly lived through recapping all the events of the modern era Saints games. After listing to this wild reality the boss recalls and a brief moment of awkward silence from the gang, the tension is broken by Johnny Gat who’s only response to all of this is “you know it’s with one L bitch” A call out to the diehard Saints fans who were outraged to find Stilwater had been misspelled in the later games.
As the boss enters back into the real world he comes to realize The Saints have been sitting pretty under the new leadership of Ultor headed by Eric Gryphon. Upon seeing the way The Saints have essentially been bought out by Ultor and rarely even appear as a gang unless it involves strong-arming an opposition to Ultor for a nice payday, The player begins to fear The Saints are doomed to end up just like how he had envisioned during his comma.
The boss confronts The Saints members about his fears and explains that instead of running the town they had fought and killed to claim, they are content being bought out by the same “corporate assholes” who tried to eliminate them. Met with mixed opinions from the group, the player confronts Gryphon about cutting ties with the Ultor group in favor of reviving the old Saints. Knowing without The Third Street Saints he faces the likely odds of losing the public backing and opening up the opportunity for other companies to move into Stilwater unopposed, Gryphon attempts to bribe The Saints to stay on board.
Turning down the offer, The Saints once again move back into the church where they get back to the basics. The Saints get word through Shaundi of a new gang sprouting up who look to dispose of The Saints and their corporate backers. Naturally, The Player confronts the leader in a meeting organized by Shaundi to explain that The Saints had broken their ties with Ultor and extend the olive branch for this new gang to dissolve by way of joining The Third Street Saints. The opposing gang doesn’t believe that ties have been cut and it is revealed that the whole meeting was set up from the start in an effort to ambush The Saints.
While dealing with the newly growing, anti-establishment rival gang, the old “Enemy of my enemy” trope is put into effect as desperate times call for desperate measures, Gryphon reaches out to mutual rival Dex in an attempt to recruit him in order to eliminate The Saints in exchange for a 50/50 split partnership in Ultor. Dex joins forces with the man he had put a hit on the prior year in an attempt to once and for all snuff out The Saints and finally gain control of The Ultor Corporation.
Thus the plot of Saints Row 3 is set. The Saints return to their roots in the fight against and anti-establishment rival game as well as the establishment itself headed by the turncoat you’ve been waiting to get your hands on for years.